Why I started this blog:

Many people are very private about their lives, their struggles and especially their children.  So why did I decide to open up about JC's issues and the problems that we face?  Let me explain:

"oh, that child is too old for a bottle!"

"well, if that were my child I would make him sit down!"

"my, my - isn't he so busy!"

"you just have to make him eat, he's just doing it because he can get away with it'

And that doesn't even begin to account for the stares, whispers, and blatant eye rolls.

We have even experienced other children making fun of JC because of his inability to speak plainly... while the mother watched - and didn't say a word.  

I have never been the type of person who cared one bit about what other people thought of me.   OF ME... its very different when its your child.  The instinct to protect is very strong, especially when you know what a struggle life has been so far for him.  I want to lash out at these people, shame them for their words and insensitivity.  But even more than that - I want to educate them. So I armed myself with information and it soon became apparent that the majority of people know very little if anything about Sensory Processing Disorder.  And even those who do know about it have so many misconceptions.  Its not a disorder that affects a child's appearance, so there is no visual clue to people that something may be "wrong" with a child.  Its sometimes mistaken for autism (which is often a co-diagnosis), but even that has a stereotype that isn't accurate in many situations.  To the average person, it simply appears to be a behavioral problem.  Nothing that a little tough discipline couldn't correct.

Sidenote on discipline:  Let me tell you a little about me as a mother.  Being a mother is my greatest achievement and the thing that I am most proud of in my life.  That's not to say that its the only thing of interest that I have accomplished (I graduated from a prominent college, worked in corporate America, managed hundreds of people), but I can honestly say that I measure my success by the happiness of my children.  I dote on them, I think they are the best children in the world and I am more proud than any other mother could ever be (I know i just described every mother reading this :))  I spoil them more than I should, I allow more fast food than I should, and more desserts than I should, and more tv than I should.  But, I am not a push-over.  I run a tight ship.  I pick my battles and when I mean business, they know it.  My 7 year old is a well mannered child with a huge heart and compassion for others.  When I look at him, I know that I must be a pretty good mother, because he is an awesome kid.  I am telling you all of this to explain that "discipline' is not the problem for JC.  I have already been through the terrible two's with one child and while I know each child is different, I also know that my parenting style hasn't changed that drastically in the past 5 years.  Now, I know you aren't supposed to compare your children - but I have found that comparing them helps me understand just how difficult things have been for JC.  He was never a happy baby - in fact I have very few pictures of him as an infant because he was always upset.  He has been a cranky toddler and is very high maintenance.  If I hadn't already gone through raising one child, I may think this behaviour to be "normal".  I may think "oh, its just colic" or "oh, he's just going through the terrible two's".  If he had been my first child I would have wondered what I was doing wrong!  But realizing the extreme difference between BB and JC helped me know when I needed to seek out a medical evaluation.  I am thankful that God gave JC to me as a second child because I was better prepared to be the mother that he needed... and he has the best big brother ever!

I read something very true today, "A worried mother does more research than the FBI".  I have spent hours researching topics that relate to JC's needs.  In my opinion, I need to be an expert on everything relating to my children.  So, I am working to become an expert on SPD and speech problems as they relate to JC.  Researching information for my blog entries may lead me to a new therapy idea or a new insight that will aid me in helping JC.  It is from this drive to gather more knowledge, and from the desire to raise awareness and compassion, that this blog was formed.   I also want to be able to say to the next person who provides unsolicited advice, "JC is dealing with SPD so he has difficulties focusing/coping/functioning in this environment.  If you'd like to learn more about how not to be an obnoxious busy-body, please visit my blog".  Well - maybe a little nicer than that but you get the idea :)